Ron’s Thoughts #1

  • Since I am a champion, anything I eat for breakfast is the breakfast of at least one champion.
  • Some people say that I have a great beard and that’s all right.  Others just tell me I’m really hairy, and I don’t really appreciate that too much.  I don’t mind when my barber says it because that’s more of a professional consultation.
  • I hate all those hipsters that are so into the nighttime all of a sudden.  I loved the night before it was even dark.
  • If the world is snobs vs. slobs, I am with the slobs.
  • The McRib is a sandwich for those that don’t live within 50 miles of real barbecue.
  • How do you know if someone listens to NPR?  They begin every other sentence with “I heard the most interesting thing on NPR today.”
  • Some people don’t mind having diminished mental capabilities because they have nothing worth thinking about anyway.  They just use their brains for holding up hair.
  • I have a hard time with motion-sensor paper towel dispensers.  I usually move so stealthily that I have to stop moving so ninja-like just so I can dry my hands.

And yes, a few of these have been facebook status updates lately.  And this column was inspired by this classic scene.

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About ronfreeman42

I'm trustworthy.
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